RSVP (invitation)

High society in England adopted French etiquette at the end of the 18th century, and the works of Emily Post sought to offer no less stringent standards than these traditions. The publication of the late 20th century of her work, written in 1920, mentions that “Anyone who receives an invitation with RSVP” is obliged to answer .. ", ^[1] and some publications describe the violation of this rule as" unforgivable rudeness. "

Emily Post recommends that those who receive an invitation with RSVP on it respond as soon as possible, within a day or two of receiving the invitation. ^[2]

While RSVP involves a response from those who will be present and those who will not be present, there are discussions that hint that many people misunderstand the meaning of the term and do not respond if they do not intend to appear. In Las Vegas, where RSVP is the lifeblood of social events, there is discussion about the modern use of the term. There was created a version of "Cautela", according to which you need to respond only if the person accepts the invitation.

The phrase “RSVP, only with regrets” or simply “Only with regrets” is a popular variation of the RSVP Emily Post. The purpose of this phrase is to convey that "you need to answer only if you refuse," with the concomitant "if you do not answer, it will be accepted as the tacit consent to come."

More specifically, if most invitations are meant to be accepted, “RSVP only with regrets” reduces the need for communication between the inviter and the guests. The phrase “Only regrets” refers to an implied refusal, which would be formulated as a variation of the phrase “We regret to inform you that we cannot appear ...”, so that if a guest is going to attend the event, his answer will be without “regrets”.